I hear your whispers. You talk about the nights we shared as if they were your best times—nights of laughter, fire, and the illusion that nothing could touch us. To you, they’re stories worth retelling. To me, they are scars that never closed. What you abandoned still lives inside me, no matter how much I’ve tried to bury it.
You say memories are liars. That they can’t love me, can’t save me. And yet, I’ve lived inside them. My body remembers your touch. My blood remembers your pulse. My heart has never once forgotten you.
I tried to walk away, but you never left me. Even in silence, you remained. I feel you in the hours when the world sleeps. You slip into my dreams, and I let you. I’ve always let you.
You are the shadow I cannot push out.
The pulse I cannot quiet.
The forbidden fruit I reached for, knowing it would undo me.
And yes, I know the cost of it. I know what it means to carry something that was never meant to last. What I thought I could hold has turned and claimed me instead. I am bound, even when I try to pretend I’m free.
Do I remember? Always. I remember the moment my heart broke open for you, fierce and untamed. You touched the place inside me no one else has ever reached. That part of me still belongs to you, no matter how I try to fight it.
The truth that cannot be ignored our lives are no longer the same. We are moving in different directions, pulled by responsibilities, by choices, by the reality that time doesn’t wait for either of us. Reaching out now would only bring more ruin, more fire than either of us can afford.
So I stay silent. Not because I don’t feel you, but because life is louder than my longing. Because what we are cannot live in the world we’re in now.
Still—when you come to me in dreams, when the world falls away, I surrender. Because even in ruin, you still feel like home.
You are not just a dream.
You are my obsession.
The echo in my veins, the ache in my chest, the hunger I can’t starve.
And though I know you are not here to save me, only to consume me—I will always reach for you in the quiet, in the hidden, in the places no one else can see.
Because no matter how different our lives have become, no matter how much distance stretches between us, every road I take still bends back to you.
Always to you.
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