The Infinite Starr

consciousness

  • Keep on Keeping On

    Somewhere after the shadow work, the awakening, and the stripping away of everything you once knew to be true, life gets strange. People you swore you could not live without become names you rarely say. The things you thought you needed find other hands. Even memory begins betraying its promises. A face you were certain…

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  • Almost

    There were rules nobody remembered agreeing to. The alarm sounded at the same hour each morning, coffee filled the same cup, and traffic gathered beneath the same red lights while hundreds of people stared through windshields toward places they had already been yesterday. Hours became numbers in an account, numbers became houses, cars, groceries, vacations,…

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  • No Dominion

    Eventually, you stop dancing with the devil beneath the pale moonlight and let the devil do what the devil is going to do. There is little reason to interrupt a good storyteller when every lie, given enough time, develops a strange habit of revealing the truth. Sometimes the truth arrives quietly. Sometimes it walks through…

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  • Consequences of Division

    The demons had been unusually restless since the veil began to thin. They had always lived among us, although in earlier centuries they possessed the dignity to remain mostly invisible. They preferred cathedrals after midnight, the bedsides of dying kings, the corners of rooms where grief had been left unattended for too many years. They…

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  • The Ones Who Remember

    They underestimated what you could do, who you are. The first attempt happened before you could speak. You wouldn’t remember it. That was the point. By five, you had already learned to watch people’s faces before listening to their words. By eight, you understood that love occasionally packed a suitcase. By twelve, betrayal had introduced…

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  • I Knew You’d Come Back for Me

    I closed my eyes because someone told me the answers were inside. I thought that was bullshit. Most advice given to people who don’t know what to do with their lives eventually involves breathing. Breathe deeply. Be present. Clear your mind. As if the mind has ever agreed to be cleared simply because someone asked…

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  • As you wish..

    Perhaps the cruelest thing God ever did was remember everything. Imagine eternity with no locked doors. No unanswered questions. No accidents. No wrong turns. No lovers who leave before morning. No death waiting somewhere beyond the candlelight. No possibility that the thing standing in the shadows might actually hurt you. You know everything. You are…

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  • Why?

    If time were currency you would spend less on the bullshit. You would. You would stop handing entire afternoons to people you don’t even like. You would quit spending Tuesday arguing with strangers who will be forgotten by Thursday. You wouldn’t donate perfectly good years to jobs that make you miserable, relationships that already died,…

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  • Borrowed Things

    Maybe it is just boredom that has brought me here, tired of human suffering. Not because suffering is unusual. Because it repeats itself with remarkable dedication. I sat watching people today and couldn’t decide what they were actually chasing. A better job. A bigger house. Someone else’s attention. An argument they intended to win before…

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  • The Kitchen Table Between Worlds

    In the mornings clarity settles in without any judgement. There is something sacred about the first few moments before the world remembers your name. Before the phone lights up. Before coffee has convinced your body to participate. Before obligations begin collecting their debt. The mind is quiet then. It has already spent the night doing…

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